Divorce with children is never easy. Even if you are the one who signed the divorce papers, you still have to maintain your dignity in front of your children. It is difficult to restore the feeling of being loved and cherished by your ex-spouse, when you do not want them to remember. The feeling of being loved and cherished by your ex-partner should not be an everyday reality for you. You should put in all efforts to restore the feeling of being loved and cherished by your ex-partner, even if it was not your decision to divorce.
How to Avoid Problems from Post-Divorce Period by Taking 3 Steps
Divorce has been officially recorded as a serious threat to the stability of any marriage. It is a time of crucial changes in the life of every couple, and the divorcees are subject to a complicated set of influences from their partners’ sides. The most important and direct influence from outside is the fear of divorce. Everybody knows that a breakup is a very traumatic experience. It is especially difficult to deal with a period of emotions and tension when the fate of your family is in your hands. However, the fear of divorce is far from being universal. There are several reasons why people can become afraid of a divorce and its consequences.
The Fear of Recurrence
Most likely, before the divorce, the previous marriage had a significant impact on your life. The fear of a relapse is natural and inevitable. Most likely the fear of a relapse is a direct result of the previous marriage. The fear of recrudescence is very strong and can be very dangerous. It is especially dangerous when it is a problem of infidelity. In such a situation, it is better to take measures to fight the fear of relapse and get rid of unwanted thoughts. It is very difficult to restore the emotional state of your spouse, even if you do everything together. After all, it is not worth remembering that the breakup was caused by infidelity.
The Fear of Recurrent Problems
Most likely, during the divorce, the spouses had many problems that are very likely to arise again. That is why the fear of a relapse is such a serious problem for divorcing couples. Moreover, many of them are very likely to return to the original problem. The fear of a relapse is a very strong emotion that can cause a person to relapse. And that is why it is so important to get rid of such thoughts and beliefs. It is logical that the fear of a relapse is higher than the fear of the future loss of what was once your good life.
The Need for Scientific Investigation
What is going on in your head during the divorce is very complicated and may require a lot of help. The fear of a relapse is completely irrational. It requires a lot of scientific investigation to figure out what is happening and what can be done to prevent the relapse. The fear of recrudescence will give you a lot of problems and will keep you from realizing the error of your ways. The fear of marital problems will make you avoid talking about them and will make you look like you are not interested in anything. It will also make you avoid talking about your spouse and will make you feel like you are not in love with him/her. Finally, the desire for constant business will make you avoid talking about problems your spouse has with you.
The Need for a New Relationship
Someone thinks that a divorce is inevitable. Someone wants to change the relationship structure. But let’s look at this from another perspective. Someone wants to live with his or her spouse for a certain time. But this is impossible. Only someone who is ready to move on and start over again can do this. Otherwise, people just give up hope and never get out of a divorce habit.
How to Prevent a Relapse
You have to understand that the breakdown does not begin in a single day. It is usually a long period of time. You need to understand how to prevent a relapse. And the first thing is to understand that the breakdown is not your fault. You need to take care of personal safety and well-being.
If you think that you would be safe if only your spouse were safe, then you are on the right track. But if you think that the safety of your children was your primary concern, then you go on the wrong path. The worst thing is when you realize that you have made a decision without understanding what will happen in the course of the divorce. In which case, you are very likely to return to the situation you came from.
How to Prevent a Relapse
You have to understand that the breakdown does not begin in a single day. It is usually a long period of time. You need to understand how to prevent a relapse. And the first thing is to understand that the underlying problem is not going to be solved by changing one’s attitude and outlook. The underlying problem is the fear of new experiences.