Divorce is a serious psychological trauma which profoundly affects not only the family but also can have a devastating effect on childrens emotional state and well-being. Yet, despite all the psychological difficulties which divorcing people experience, it is crucial to look at the picture from another angle.
Perhaps- the easiest way to help your children avoid the emotional instability which often occurs during the divorce process is to give them as much space as they need during the divorce process. You can either:
Provide children with a strong parental figure and encourage them to talk to their friends and relatives who are already divorced or
Send them to special camps where they will be supervised by a professional counselor and do not live with your other children while you are at work.
All of these seem to be the best solutions, but there is still a third option which is even more preferable. Let your children contact the other parent to let them share their feelings and worries.
Letting the Other Parent Discuss Divorce Issues
Divorce is a serious issue which deeply affects not only the marital relationship but also the psychological, social and material well-being of every divorcing couple. It is obvious why the spouses would want to discuss and solve all the issues on their own, but it is also very important to understand how this will happen and who will be in the driver’s seat.
If you are divorcing and have children, then further discussion about your divorce process with your spouse is outside the scope of your parental obligations. Your children are not your to blame, they are just as important as you and your ex to provide you with a sense of community, to provide witness to your partners faults and to learn from their example. So, in your view, your children should feel the love and care of both parents, and you will do your best to provide them with the necessary information to make this love and care real.
If you have no children and have no desire to discuss your divorce issues with your ex-spouse, then you need to create your own strategy for the future. There is no need to discuss your issues with your ex-partner simply because you are divorced. Discuss them with your children if you have the opportunity, but also suggest having a talk with your spouse about your concerns. You mustn’t forget to tell your children about your plans and feelings, but never mention your divorce issues in the strongest possible way.
Children are Intelligent Enough to Know What is Best for Them
When parents are divorced and have to deal with all the physical and social challenges that family life brings to the normal life, it is not only the physical and mental health of their children that suffer, but also their emotional wellbeing. When it comes to divorce issues, children are far and few between when it comes to both parents to suffer.
Therefore, if you have children, it is better to stay current on all the latest news and events and not let your emotions run away with you. Your children are far and few between when two parents are in tears over a loss or gain because of divorce issues.
You Need Someone Who Will Help Your Children Succeed
When it comes to your children, you need a person who will give them a chance to succeed. Someone who understands that your marriage and relationship is ruined and children will not be able to survive without you. Someone who provides your children with all the necessary help and makes them feel better.
However, if you have time and desire, you can start with your divorce issues and see what you need in a person. You need someone who will help your children succeed, not just to file for divorce and get it quickly, but also to live a happy life after the divorce.
What You Need in a Person
So, you have decided to file for divorce. It is a big decision, you need to make with your soulmate. It is emotional, it is stressful and it takes much time. Someone who is strong and calm will do everything in the best way for you. You need someone who will give you a chance to breathe and move on.
At first glance, it is obvious why you need a person who will save you from regrets. You and your spouse are old friends and you have shared views on many issues. You two have been in the same situation together and you need someone to help you not only survive but also thrive. Someone who will protect your interests and make your divorce easier will save your time, money and health in the long run.
However, it is not only you who needs a person to protect your interests. It is your partner as well who needs someone to back you up. Someone who knows you better than anybody else and you would better believe in yourself, especially when it comes to the relationships.
Therefore, if you are looking for a person to be your soulmate, ask yourself and your spouse a few questions before you make up your mind.